Process

My post trip summary has been a hard labor....I actually thought I could blog on the road. Somewhere between Carbondale and Nebraska my filter got clogged and actually broke in Colorado Springs!  Knowing myself as I do, I thought it best to get home, sort, by running all I'd saved, unfiltered, through a dialysis machine and hope to God the new filter would get here in time for the Turner trial.  I sit here now, fingers typing away in the familiar routine of mornings that my dogs wondered where it all had gone for three weeks of trucking it, changed; deeply and profoundly changed. 

I started this journey some eight years ago, with a washed out agility rescue border collie and a burning desire.  As I look back at the years, I see in vivid Technicolor that burning desire was all about the end result conquer, there in my beginning.  I wanted to be great at "herding"!  I wanted answers....cold, hard answers....tell me how to do this herding thing.  Mentors patiently answered my endless machinegun questions while directing me to books such as "The Seven Secrets of Perfect Horsemanship". I'd often leave clinics, lessons and trials frustrated beyond measure....if only they would just give me the answers, if only I had a better dog, if only the sheep were not so dogged (or needed dogged more), or a list of other if onlys that could have been different or better, and my thirst for "getting" intensified as if I lived my life on a salt lick.  I wanted to win! At trials I felt huge dramatic downhill spirals when my dogs did poorly.  When I did win, I always wondered if I had gotten "lucky", all the while the naysayers continued their naying and my conquering thirst continued to be left unquenched.  I make a pretty darn good addict: shelves filled with books on working sheepdogs, a file-cabinet drawer overflowing with DVDs. I wanted answers, I demanded answers.  Sheep?  Who cared about the sheep....they were there for me to get this.  Sure my dogs were my friends but they really needed to step up to the plate and not let me down. 

It is not as if I woke up one day having this great vision, no clouds parted nor did an angel visit me for enlightenment.  I think the seeds were planted by those who invested in me, invested with great patience much as they do in their lives of working sheepdogs.  One day, or a whole lot of days transitioned together, I began to realize this journey....was about me.  It was not about scores, or who I beat, or how I had performed, or how others felt about me and/or my dogs.  This journey might be called by another name, and had become about relationships,  The wins and losses and scores and opinions of others became a little less important than the relationship and improved communication and belief and absolute, balls to the walls giving back that I was experiencing.  As I let go of the notion of "conquer", I found those who shared the idea of "process".  Much like a journey, end result goals are becoming just destinations while the process unfolds as amazing scenery filled with miracles, beauty, blessings along the way.  Process is my actual living.

The list of miracles, beauty and blessings along my way to there and back are endless.  Indeed this list does include some "end goal" achievements with Bella being an amazing teammate with me.  I am proud of her for those scores and placements, however placements are just the chocolate coating to the amazing filling of the trust we have in each other.  When I look up at my ninth place ribbon, I see in my mind all the suppleness, confidnece and ease of a dog working three lambs around a course and a pen she accomplished without me.  I remember her driving 20 sheep around a course in 85 degree weather/100% humidity with not a single stop to graze.  I see her flying around, not a grip to be seen, as she went to get that collared single, turning the lamb while winning the Irish judge as president of the Bella fan club. 

On the other hand, I see a whole lot of beauty in my three weeks with Nell; beauty others might not see with one score out of five runs. Nell who has shown me a little of myself, has kept me humble; knowing I need to look to myself for improvement in our relationship.  The miracles, beauty and blessings of the trip with her came with the hours of exhausting sheep at Table Top and the permission to sort.  Discussions with a friend and mentor on ideas to try out as I process with Nell. The process continues.

The human component brought plenty of blessing as well; new friends made, other relationships strengthened.  There are those who most certainly see life as an end result, their self esteem equaling their performance.  There are others whose lives are really all about themselves surrounded by those who appear to agree. Such is life and there is blessing in knowing that constant remains.  This fact gives the power of choice.  We all know that time is the money of our life: it's a limited resource that  we spend where we choose.  I've recently been reminded, socked in the gut reminded, that life is to be cherished and again, I renew my vow of living it to the fullest. I'm choosing to spending my time money on the process with those who are process motivated as well.  My dogs, family, friends and mentors pour so much into coming along side the process of me becoming.......I can not think of any greater blessing than this gift from true friends: two and four legged.  THAT is what I learned on my three week trek.

Seize the Day!

"Through perseverance many people win success out of what seemed destined to be certain failure." ~ Benjamin Disraeli

Toto, I don't Think We are in Kansas Anymore

The first leg of my journey took me to Idaho...where I picked up a partner in crime.  Somehow I talked her into the trip.....first was the Bluegrass, then Strang ranch for a look at the 2014 Finals site...and then why the heck not Table Top?  I mean we are already that way.  What was two weeks last year turned into three weeks this year made doable with a traveling companion.  I tell people she is my little sister.

First stop was Vernal Utah.....the dogs were tired of driving and so was I.  Just 5 hours shy of Carbondale, Colorado....after seeing all the big game road kill on the side of the road...I was glad we called it a night in the daylight hours!

Here is my morning Welcome Wagon...thank GOD Dot was on a leash or we would have been working deer...or attempting to practice recalls in the wee hours of dawn.  There were a flock of wild turkeys and my sidekick saw a bob cat.  Somehow I think we are not in Kansas...in fact we are at the foothills of the Rocky Mountains!

We stopped in Meeker....me, licking my wounds to the fact that I am 82nd out on the wait list for the Meeker Trial in September.  We found the famous Meeker statue and I petted the dog for good luck....then on to Strang Ranch!

There are two trial fields, both have shed rings.

All this with a view.....

Tomorrow the trial begins.  I'm hoping Bella stays sound and can give it a whirl.  Nell is happy to be here with her runs in Open and Gyp will have her go's in Pro Novice.  Here's to sweet dreams of good dog work! Tomorrow the Strang Ranch games begin!

Seize the Day.

Oh the Places You'll Go

Congratulations!
Today is your day.
You're off to Great Places!
You're off and away!

You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes
You can steer yourself
any direction you choose.
You're on your own.  And you know what you know.
And YOU are the guy who'll decide where to go.

I thought a little Dr. Seuss was in order this morning.......one of my all time favorite books.  Just a few loose ends to tidy up here at home.....the dogs need tick treatment and I need to finish packing my treasures into the trailer.  Then I am off on an adventure......

And will you succeed?
Yes! You will, indeed!
(98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed.)

KID, YOU'LL MOVE MOUNTAINS!

So...
be your name Buxbaum or Bixby or Bray
or Mordecai Ali Van Allen O'Shea,
you're off to Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So...get on your way! ~ Dr. Seuss

SEIZE THE DAY!!!!!!

I Never Meant to Fall in Love with Sheepdogs

"I never meant to fall in love with baseball, but I did. I learned to realize that it does what all good sports should do: it creates the possibility of joy." ~ Colum McCann

As I sat and read the article in the New York Times; the title "What Baseball Does to the Soul", I realized the author had exactly captured eloquently all that I feel about sheepdogs.   Don't get me wrong....I love baseball; well until it is sleeting and the game is only in the top of the third. My love is fickle as I dream of going home to the fire and reading about the game the next day in the local newspaper.  But sheepdoggin', now that is love. It can be sleeting and I'll walk to the post with anticipation....no thoughts of home until the next group of sheep are exhausted. 

As I pull, what new folks might feel is, a never ending supply of dogs from my truck, I remember the day when I thought I could only have one....maybe two trial dogs at the most.  People poke fun at me saying that I seem to lean to a certain look in a dog....INDEED!  That way my hubby can't tell when I get a new one......nor the neighbors!  My son's girlfriends might think I am a crazy dog lady and they are probably right. 

In an effort to continue to learn and provide challenging opportunity for my dogs....I work for sheep.  My sheep work is leaner this year with the shepherds young dogs coming on, so I press forward looking for those in need of a helping gather.  When my new tractorless neighbors came over to inquire what they might do about their 3 acre, tall grass filled field that continues to grow...it took me about .2 seconds to present the plan I had been thinking of for the last three weeks. Today or tomorrow, a new gate will go in between our property and I'll begin mowing for them!  The sheep can't wait. 

Faded are the memories of what life was like before I bought my little slice of Heaven.  As I try to imagine what I would do without all things sheepdogs...I can't.  Instead I scour the property listings, put the word out, ponder leaving notes in mailboxes....all in an effort to find a place to live and keep sheep.

And now I prepare for a journey.....three weeks on the road.  The longest I have ever been away from home since college.  I'm texting a friend trying to figure out all the travel details for crossing the Rockies safely.  Another friend is going with me...I'm leaving the weather to her.   I'm packing and trying to not take too much but how can one know what to wear when the Colorado trials might be in snow and the Kentucky trial might be hot and humid?  The new trailer is ready to go.... celebrating maiden voyage.  Beds are all lined with temperpedic mattresses and I'm packing food into coolers. 

Most important is the dogs and all they might need.  Anything else forgotten can either be done without or purchased on the way.  My crook is tucked safely away and the girls are getting their tick and flea dosing tomorrow.  The list of things to do does not seem to be getting smaller but I leave the ranch in the care of good friends who are honing their skill of observation.

Really, I never meant to fall in love with sheepdogs.  And here I am....smitten by the lot of them. Ever thankful for the adventures and friends brought into my life all because of these sheepdogs.  They have most certainly created  the possibility of joy!

Seize the Day!

Snap Shot...take two

Seize the Day!!!!!

Snap Shots

Take a look at this picture and what do you actually see?  Three ladies all done up.

Assumptions can be made.....it is either an old photo, or a photo taken at one of those old time photo shoot galleries from the fair. The ladies can be sisters, or friends, or maybe this is just an add for a clothing line from a Sear and Roebucks catalog. 

The lady in the bottom of the picture is my great, great grandma.  The lady in the middle of the picture is my great, great grandpa's sister...or my great great aunt.  This picture was taken in the late 1800's in Medford, Oregon.  Those are all facts that are not changed by looking at the picture.  I can also tell you who each of their mother and fathers were, where they lived and went to school.

I can  tell stories that are based on fact, my great great grandma never married my great great grandfather and ended up dying shortly after she had her son, who was then raised by her parents.  Had she married, my last name would have been different.  The rest of her story is all fiction in my mind....different versions, some of which might have slices of reality to them...as I imagine what it was like to be unwed and pregnant in that day.  I've seen the records of her schooling, both her name and his name are listed with all their siblings in the registry; the only two families attending the small school house where the homesteads were.  Did she move to California to raise her son out of shame or did she move to meet up with her lover in hopes of marrying and making a family? What was the household like that she grew up in?  Did she sew and cook or did she prefer riding horses and helping with the chores outside?  Did she run away from a heavy handed home life or was she loved beyond measure? Does the truth lie somewhere in between? Someday I might just write out my version of her life...I look into her eyes and see if I can find some truth to add to the fiction I create. The picture, however, shows three ladies all done up.

When I attend a clinic or a trial, as each dog heads out for the day, I feel much like I do when I look at this picture.  I can actually see the dog and what makes up it's physical characteristics.   There are facts: who the parents are, how old the dog is, who owns the dog.  As the dog works, I can start to puzzle some of the story together...but at the end of the day, speculation, perspective, mixed with some personal bias have changed the reality of the real truthful snap shot of the dog.  While some see style and finesse, others might say the come-forward has been taken out of the dog.  There might be talk that a trainer is "too mechanical" while others esteem the same trainer for having what it takes to save a much needed point. 

I'm working on seeing young dogs at clinics and trials as snap shots.  Looking closely at what the dog exhibiting for the day and how is the clinician or handler working with the dog to help it become the best it can be. Knowing tomorrow's snap shot might look radically different, take the dog one snap shot at a time.  Recently I attended a "starting a young dog" clinic and it was fun to use the muscles I have been working on strengthening.  The clinician did not get over-excited nor concerned about anything that any of the young dogs did.  He talked about putting a young dog away and letting them grow up if the dog did certain things. He also commented on traits he liked to see as a young dog started sorting things out on the sheep.  He never made a proclamation that a dog was going to be a top open dog or a dud with this one go on sheep. 

Looking at dogs, both others and mine, as snap shot pictures is helping me to keep focused on the day.  I've been lifting weights with my observation muscles, trying to develop strong, healthy, and precise assessments.   I'm finding that extrapolating, as with the pictures of my family, may or may not be accurate especially when others are inserting conjectures.  I do see the value that comes from experience with a certain line of dog and enjoy discussions with those I respect while learning from them.  I'm also trying to remember that the dog in the snap shot is an individual and I need to look to the day for training.  I guess it is like "living in the moment"...dealing with "what is": the snap shot.

I'm getting ready to hit the road, attending three trials as I head to the Bluegrass and back.  It's new territory to me and the run order is filled with handlers I don't know.  I'm going to try and take advantage of being able to step back and look at the snap shots of each dog for the day.  I'm hoping to take notes off the running orders so that when I get home, I can look back and remember.  It will be fun to see how each dog of interest progresses as we head to the finals in October. 

I'm not sure I have done a good job with this blog post.  It has taken me a month to write!  I feel like I have dummed down something that I am disciplining myself to achieve with my assessing eyes.  When I bring my dog out, I feel like I am showing the world a photo album. All the snap shots, big events and daily slice of life's,  coming together...and what people see is just the snap shot of the day.  Snap shots......just that!

Seize the Day!!!

Time & Distance

I am not sure I have had a dog with the presence that Dot has.  Maybe Bella, but I don't remember this phase as her tension release was a grip and that consumed me. I'm also wondering out loud about Dot's presence and the fact she needs to be off her sheep to settle everything.  Being close to the sheep, she creates a lot of tension in them while this creates more tension in her and so we have the cause and effect creating more cause.  She is looking good in the comfort of her own home; fields she knows and sheep she has seen before.  Even when I mix it up with lambs or katahdins, she is adjusting and sorting.

I worked Dot at a friend's place yesterday; fresh sheep, new field.  Needless to say, Dot was too close to the sheep.  He suggested I try laying her down, but with her distance from the sheep wrong...I could not.  I felt like she was trying to be good, but  the reaction she was causing in the sheep was making her reactionary and so I called her off and we called it a day. Now there was a lot I loved about her little session on the sheep but my thoughts drift to presence, distance and time. After a brief chat about the amount of presence Dot appears to have, we both agreed, what might be a good distance for some dogs was way too close for Dot; at least for today.  The discussion, post go on sheep, was about the two ways to get distance. 1) lay the dog down and drift the sheep to show the dog the correct distance or 2) opening the dog up with pressure to get the proper distance with an open flank. 

I am preferring the third way with Dot: Time.  A really good dog trainer friend of mine has talked endless hours with me about "latent learning".  My version of latent learning is that while on sheep the dog might not change or show learning and adjust, but after putting the dog away it demonstrates what it learned and sorted the next time out.  Maybe this is not the best of definitions but it is how I see it.  To my knowledge, I have not experienced latent learning to its fullest......until Dot. 

Another interesting Dot phenomenon is that, at this time, when I put pressure on her, she puts pressure back; speeding up and trying to beat it. That is not exactly what I want to do when she is creating tension in the sheep and all the side effects from that.  Also, a trainer friend has told me that it is hard to lay a young, inexperienced dog down when their distance is wrong.  I fight myself minute by minute wanting understanding for distance and not creating a "lie down war". I've had enough warring to last a life time...and paid for far too many "lie down" lessons to not be able to get one myself.  I'm sorting being fair with this young dog, three months new to me, not forcing a lie down or taking a stand just yet on "do what I say darn you".  I'll earn that right down the road....until then I don't want to ask until I know the distance is right and I will get lie down.  The real issue is the distance.....at least for now.....and then I can see if there is a lie down issue.  Or so I hope.

So time it is.....time and miles and time and miles.  I've said that before...and had it said to me so many times its become mine with no care of plagiarism.  Those words do not bother me as they did the first time I heard them.  Now I see that the dog will tell me what the day should bring: if I'm willing that is. "There is a time to plant...and a time to sow."  Time.

Oh how I love the gift of starting a new dog.....so much good over-thinking!

Seize the Day!