Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Perfect......Influence

Isn't it interesting that one word can have a different meaning based on where one puts emphasis/focus. 

Perfect: per-fekt adj -entirely without any flaws, defects, or shortcomings

Perfect: per-fect verb - to bring closer to perfection; improve

Such is life....where we put our focus; our emphasis...is where we get meaning.

I've been listening to, and reading, sports psychology for many years now, starting when my boys began to play sports. I find it fascinating...especially for one who thinks....about that stuff.....lots! Visualization has been pretty easy for me...I have a very creative mind when it comes to daydreams.....and I practice filling in details: colors, smells, temperature, which way I sent the dog....very vividly! 


Where I have had to dig deep, work hard, and practice diligence is....my self talk.  You know, those voices inside my head that point out over and over and over all the things I do wrong.  Those voices that remind me of past failures, even failures 20 years ago, that don't even count for much any more...I'm married, stupid voices!.  Those grudge holding voices that not only point out failures but, if left to run rampant, show me, in exaggerated, grandiose detail, how I will fail again.  They don't tiptoe, instead stamp madly about shaking my brain...reminders of past, current and potential future failures created, so the voices sing...loser!  Those voices are many, and are my dragons that need slayed.  Those voices are not just about dogs and trialing...they started long ago with relationships, food relationships, competition and fitting in with "that group". They speak to me while I am treating my llama...all the things I missed in diagnosis and lack of care as I focused on myself and my quest for that nod to the finals. They speak to me of that one time I sent Sally, walking to the post while she watched the sheep be exhausted into the trailer behind me. When I sent her...she made the short trip to the trailer to bring me sheep......how stupid can one handler be?  I could go on but you get the drift,  they speak to me.......they are not nice.......they are meant to demean....and they suck!


I'm working a good program to slay those dragon voices in my mind. It's taken me some time to let go of per-fekt-ion and train my brain to see the learning gifts in the im-per-fekt.  When life does not go as planned, I'm working at stepping back and looking at the good, what needs work, what needs changed and then back to cleaning up my thoughts to head towards where I want to go and be.  No dwelling on what went wrong. I've also chosen to be real careful what I let flow through my ears into my brain...where those words can either create feeding frenzies for my dragons, or assist my slaying. One reason I like my iPod....it is a good tool for letting in only dragon slayers. It's another reason I really, really love my family and close friends.  They certainly understand my dragons and know they can be assistant slayers.


Guru of positive thoughts and managing a strong mental game, "dragon slayer for hire" Lanny Bassham talks about the incredible power of words.  With that, he addresses self degradation talk:.  so easy to fall into, especially when the far extreme is the boastful person who can't stop talking about how great they are. In an effort to not come across as an egotistical jerk, instead, it is easy to put oneself down, in a humorous fashion, in an effort to be humble.  Lanny Bassham encourages me not to do that.  He says to be careful with my words....somebody very important is listening....ME! Say words enough...they will be believed.


The Phoenix and the dragon look similar, don't they.  Back to focus.  This is not about winning or losing for me.  It's about becoming....becoming all that I have the potential to become in the time I am given. There are "black dog" days in my life where I feed and water the slain...then the dragons open their wings and roar.  Days where getting out of bed, let alone facing people, feels like Mt. Everest.  I wonder if others fight to slay dragons?  All I know is: I do, daily.  Life is ever too short to let the dragons nest and multiply in my brain.  Influence....it carries so much responsibility; daily I need to remember to respect the incredible power of words.

Please, Don't Feed The Dragons.

Seize the Day!

2 comments:

  1. Glad I get the first comment spot.

    Love ya tons.

    Assistant dragon slayer at your service. Payment accepted in likewise barter.

    ReplyDelete
  2. I like dragons. They offer up some reflection. I've often wondered if they are so mean because they have indigestion...you know all that fire in their bellies, something bad they ate. Some times a dragon is just a poor ol'garter snake - if looked at from a different view point. ;-) Tame the dragon. Learn from it. Understand it.

    ReplyDelete