Relationship.....

I participated an interesting conversation yesterday as I worked dogs amongst friends.  Much of the focus of discussion was on training the dog.  As I stepped back to develop my thesis to defend why I felt the dog training was a small portion of what was happening at that time...I found myself thinking of the two other important aspects of the final product of working a dog on sheep.  One would be the training of the handler....to see/know what the sheep are thinking/doing and to also see where the dog needs to be in regards to the sheep to accomplish the desired task.  And the most important aspect that is often not mentioned or discussed: the "relationship" between the trained dog and trained handler.  Of the three....if feels like the "relationship" is the hardest for me to wrap my head around....or put my finger on...to describe exactly what I am longing for in each of my dogs. And yet it can be the most important nuance to the final product of working sheep with a dog.

While I was out doing chores at the ranch today, I kept thinking about relationship and what exactly does that word mean to me.  Dictionary.com defines relationship as "a connection, association, or involvement."  Now that is seriously lacking.....so I continue to sort through definitions...."an emotional or other connection ".  Still missing the mark....."the mutual dealings, connections, or feelings that exist between two parties".  Reality check here...a dictionary is not going to help me put into words the relationship I have and continue to strive to deepen with my working dogs.

I realized a great start in defining that elusive fog like apparition of "relationship" can be looked at first, by what it is not.  It is not about make.  I think back to Jack Knox telling me "when you get your dog to stop for you...instead of making her stop for you....you will be able to run your dog".  I can't make my dog have a relationship with me....well at least not the relationship I am striving for.

 I'll add in some of what I believe relationship is founded on.....respect.  Yep there is that word...the one  that can turn the most "pet oriented" dog owner into an anti-anthropomorphism authority.  The same person that allows dogs to jump up on them and nip them....leave for the sheep without permission....often becomes all defensive when the word "respect" is used in regard to their "relationship" with their dog.  However, in my journey....respect is something I am looking closer at....with each and every one of my dogs....every step of the way.  I happen to believe that disrespectful behavior off sheep towards me....takes away for the relationship "on sheep" that I am working towards.  And I do believe that dogs are capable of respect/disrespect....both giving it and getting it amongst their pack order and with humans.

 Holding hands with respect in equal measure is "trust", "obedience", "understanding", and "accountability".  Obedience and training......leads to understanding of the job and what is being asked.....with the trust that neither will be left out hanging as we have each others' back.  Accountability on both parts....my punishment will fit the crime and I will let it go and not hold a grudge....while I trust my dog to do what every DNA strand is telling them to do unless I ask different.

My mentor once told me (here interpreted by my own words) that every now and again you go to a sheepdog trial and see a dog that takes your breath away.  However, at the end of the day...it is generally the dog and handler working together with a deep relationship that makes for a great run. 

How do you define "relationship"?  Do you long for greater understanding and the probing of unexplored depths in your relationship with your working dog?  Do you feel "relationship" is important?

Do you think my husband should come back from Arizona so I can stop thinking and just do?

Seize the Day!!!!